Book Review: You are a Badass That Needs to Forgive

By Rachel Hanrahan, Digital Content Specialist

From the February 2019 Lessiter Link newsletter

While the title of this book may be a tad jarring, the message is crystal clear. I read You Are A Badass by Jen Sincero for my personal benefit, but quickly realized that the principles described can be easily translated to the professional realm.

One of the most useful tools Sincero provides is a speedy process of forgiveness. The LM core value of teamwork is served best when we can move through conflict effectively.

Below are Sincero’s steps to forgiving and forgetting:

  1. “Find compassion.Imagine that the person you are having issues with is acting out from a place of fear and uncertainty. This will help you find compassion for them and see things from their point of view.
  2. "Erase the other person from the equation." You are in this situation. You can't control the other person. Your only choice is how you react. If you imagine the situation without the other person, you have no one to be mad at.
  3. "Decide you'd rather be happy than right." Wouldn't you love the freeing feeling of letting it all go? What can you do in this moment to feel at peace with the situation?
  4. "Look at it from all angles." We often focus on our feelings and our peers' perception of us. Take a step back from worrying about yourself and see the situation from a bird's-eye view. Consider that the situation is a result of something you did, that you are the only person capable of making this situation a positive one.
  5. "Have a total sh*tfit." Enjoy some solitary moments with a temper tantrum. Go home to your pet turtle and tell him all of the horrible things you've been thinking all day. Call your best friend and rant until they hang up on you. Get it out of your system, totally and completely, and then let it go.
  6. "Remind yourself that you probably won't even remember this." In a few days or weeks, this will blow over. The situation will be resolved at some point in time and the only thing left will be the memory of how you handled it. Would you like to feel good about that? Or do you want to cringe every time you think about it?
  7. "Fuggetaboutit." Just drop it and move on. Wipe the slate clean. Let everyone off the hook.